Eat, Sleep, Play, Repeat
Reflections on getting halfway through year two of Project 52 and my plans for the next 26 weeks.
We’ve had a new member join our family recently. No, I am not referring to myself. I’m referring to Ms Chuntoo Lobo, the little kitten pictured below. She’s a bundle of joy and I’ve been learning a lot from her.
The timing of her arrival was perfect. I was born recently too, and so I took cues from her as to how best to spend my time. All newborns spend their time doing one of four things — eating (and drinking and pooping), sleeping (or just resting), and playing. I quickly realised that this is how I want to spend the rest of my life. I don’t want to do anything other than eat, sleep, play, repeat.
My intention for this year of Project 52 is to digest distress and deepen embodiment. At week 26, halfway through, I’ve got a hang of digesting distress — of transmuting trauma. The root of all distress and trauma is fear —and the creeper of fear has been rooted out of my system. It’s not that I don’t feel fear anymore — the creeper can still start growing. But it doesn’t have a hold on my life— it doesn’t have deep roots and I can pull it out easily. I am no longer a prisoner of fear.
On the other hand, the seed of a visceral sense of safety has been planted in me. For the coming 26 weeks (and beyond), my intention is to cultivate this sense of safety and let it bloom in my life! I want this feeling of safety to permeate into the core of my being. I want to become an incarnation — the embodiment — of love, light, and life! I need to create the space for all this to happen, and therefore, play! I want to create a leisurely and playful life — and I have started by surrendering to and meandering through life.
Before I talk about the new habits that I am going to start cultivating to help me increase incarnation, here is an update on the achievements that I set out to unlock for the 2nd quarter:
No alcohol — Success. And I will be drinking rarely from now.
No porn+No fap — Fail at 11th week. Conscious decision to break the streak. Deliberate sabotage of ego. No regrets, no shame. The big fear was - what if I don't get someone as my romantic partner, what if I'm forever alone? Surrendered to that fear. And it disappeared.
No (new) TV shows — Fail at 12th week. Watched Squid Game.
No movies (except Dune, in the theatre, when it comes out) — Fail at 10th week. Watched Free Guy and Suicide Squad. Watched Dune in the theatre too, and it was everything I hoped for (and more)!
13 strict pull-ups (currently at ~8) — Fail. Maintaining at 8.
13 strict chin-ups (currently at ~8) — Fail. Maintaining at 8.
Unlock one new dish — Success. Salad Supreme! It’s a mad medley of cucumber, tomato, onion, carrot, pomegranate, capsicum (red, yellow, green), zucchini, microgreens, lemon.
Here are the habits that I will be cultivating for the third quarter:
Swimming — I don’t know how to. Time to change that. The goal is to be able to swim one lap by the end of this quarter.
Driving — Gotta re-learn this. Haven’t bothered to take the car out since I got my licence a decade ago. The goal is to go on a road trip.
Meditation+Chanting+Breathwork — I want to create a personal ritual for embodiment. The goal is to at least do the meditation part for 70 days. To make this happen, I need to have dinner by 7.30 pm, sleep by 10 pm, and wake up by 5:30 am.
Prayer — I do this already, but I have just added several new incantations to my prayer and I want to really dedicate myself to this. The goal is to do this every day.
11 strict pull-ups (currently at ~8).
11 strict chin-ups (currently at ~8).
Create or master one new dish.
I’m still getting the hang of being Frank. But with a clear commitment to surrender and meander, I’m making steady progress. This quarter, I finally released everything that was holding me back and weighing me down.
Now, it’s time to soar to the skies!
Good luck for everything ahead bruv! Rooting for you!